One’s philosophy is not best expressed in words; it is expressed in the choices one makes… and the choices we make are ultimately our responsibility.
~ Eleanor Roosevelt
This topic of FREEWILL or CHOICE is clearly an important one.
It is easy for us to say that we are ‘free to choose’ or that we have ‘freedom’, especially in America.
We are founded on the principles of freedom, of capitalism and democracy that says you are free to live (nearly) any way you choose, work at any job you choose, live in any town, city, or state you choose, drive any car you choose, etc…
If that is the case, however, then why is much of the population living unhappy and unfulfilling lives as if we are not free?
Do we even know what freedom means?
Do we even BELIEVE we are free?
We find ourselves stuck in unsatisfying dead-end jobs, feeling trapped in toxic relationships, out of options due to poverty, helpless due to physical or mental illnesses.
In all of life’s situations it is so easy to say “because of _______ I can’t have/do _______”
If that were true
- it would mean we are victims trapped by circumstances and not free at all.
- It would mean that every person in history who was in that same situation NEVER FOUND A WAY OUT because THERE IS NO WAY OUT.
- It would mean that every person that is to come after us with similar circumstances is doomed because they fell into the very trap that destroys lives with NO WAY OUT.
- It would mean our ONLY options are to succumb to addictions, take prescription meds, get on government subsidies, or stay in miserable jobs because we “need the money”, or stay in abusive relationships, be depressed, hopeless and powerless
(I’m not casting stones here… I’ve done, said and felt all those things myself)
But are those statements really true?
I think most people could get past those statements and agree that freedom means I have a choice to stay in this situations or to get the courage, drive, creativity, and self-worth to break free from the limits claiming to hold us captive.
And what are those limits? I’m glad you asked!
As I see it, the more important truth here is:
WE ARE FREE TO BELIEVE WHAT WE CHOOSE TO BELIEVE ABOUT OURSELVES AND OUR CIRCUMSTANCES.
BELIEF REFRAMING EXERCISE
|WHEN I CURRENTLY BELIEVE||I CAN CHOOSE TO BELIEVE|
|I am not smart enough||I can learn what I need|
|I am not skilled enough||I can get the skills I need|
|I had a horrible childhood||my past doesn’t define my future|
|I am my own worst enemy||I am my best friend|
|I’ve tried before and failed||to stop trying is to guarantee failure|
|But I’m afraid||Faith cast out fear|
|But leaving my comfort is hard||Staying miserable forever is harder|
|I need _______ to be happy||I am happy while pursuing ______|
|I can’t do ________||I can do ___________|
|I’m depressed||I’m empowered, alive, beautiful and FREE|
Clearly, this list could go on for miles.
As you can see, this exercise is incredibly easy to do.
- Grab any piece of paper and make two columns.
- In the left column list the items that are the current “thought” limitations in life that are preventing you from true happiness and fulfillment
- In the right column counter all those limiting beliefs with an opposite reality.
- NOW CHOOSE TODAY TO CHANGE YOUR BELIEFS ABOUT YOUR LIMITATIONS
I know it may sound easier said than done, but after decades of battling my own demons, in the end, I realized it’s not difficult at all, it is a choice, it’s a decision!
I no longer choose to label myself as a victim of circumstances, today I am a warrior in pursuit of my dreams.
Most all of our problems in life stem from the disconnect we have from our UNDERSTANDINGS and BELIEFS.
We can say “I am free” and mean it, yet believe and feel we are trapped, helpless, and hopeless.
These are the subconscious limiting beliefs at the core of all of our indecisions, misfires, and our mindless and endless groundhog day experiences… nothing ever changes if we don’t’ change it.
And labels are one of the biggest problems here. “I have PTSD”, “I am an addict/alcoholic”, “I have an eating disorder”, “I am poor”, “I am weak-willed”, “I don’t have time”, “I can’t because…”.
It we don’t first change the “I AM” statements we will forever be self-sabotaging any success we attempt or desire.
Once we discover that it is our BELIEFS that hold us captive and not our circumstances, we will then truly understand what real freedom is.
Real freedom is a choice.
And we are always choosing to live in the solution or be defined by our problems; whether we realize it or not.
It is a single decision to believe differently that can change a life immediately and forever.
“Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t–you’re right.”
~ Henry Ford
Here’s to your best life now!! ~George
Nikaos Strategic Coaching – I myself have overcome PTSD, Social Anxiety Disorder and a host of addictions and am now living my best life, every day. Does that mean it is easy, no… but I am no longer held captive by my limiting beliefs and unhelpful thinking patterns and I have found freedom from believing that my severe childhood physical, sexual, mental, emotional and spiritual abuses made me who I was; today I am happy and at peace with myself and the world and I am boldly pursuing my dreams in every area of my life. And part of my passion, calling and gifting is helping others awaken their inner-warrior and find the same freedom I have found.
Learn more about how I can help you on your journey to true freedom